The gift of Reiki energy healing has been immeasurably profound for me and my clients in every aspect of life, not the least of which is relationships.

I was teaching a lot about healing relationships and lo and behold, I had a meltdown. Something my partner said triggered an avalanche of emotions. Like little land mines, he had stepped too close to old feelings of being shut down or rejected, and I felt like a Mack truck had run over my chest.

When talking about it did not really release the hurt, my partner finally asked “What can I do?” “REIKI” I replied. He put his hands on me and the familiar calming energy instantly flowed through my being. Within minutes my heart ache subsided. Plus my partner was so relieved that he finally could offer something helpful! While I now teach other healing techniques, Reiki is still my go-to foundational healing modality personally and professionally.

Gratefully, with all the healing work I have done the emotional “land-mines” are fewer and far between. The good news is you do not have to be a professional energy healer to begin healing your relationships.

Reiki is Not Your Personal Energy

Healing relationships is possible even in the first level of Reiki. The attunement or initiation process hooks you up to universal life force energy, so you are not flowing your own personal energy. Even when you may feel upset or unclear, Reiki will come to the rescue.

It is a wonderful gift in any relationship to give each other treatments. It is a way of connecting deeply, without words, and there is no need to know what to say or do for someone in order to help them. Gratefully, there are no psychology degrees required here.

Reiki is a protected channel

This is really important, as I have encountered many other types of healers saying they are absorbing or taking on the negative energy of others, and even feeling their arms going numb or becoming painful. So if you are working with someone who is upset or sick, you are not using your own energy or personal ki (chi or life force) and therefore not at risk of mixing energies with someone else’s “stuff”.

The practitioner is also receiving the Reiki energy as he or she is delivering a treatment, so they are feeling better and more energized also.

Self-Treatment Goes to the Core

Even when you may not have a partner to give you a treatment, the beauty of Reiki is the ability to do “self-treatment”. Reiki can be applied by the practitioner immediately after the first degree class regardless of their experience.

This can smooth out any emotional upsets that arise, and empowers you to have unlimited access to a healing resource “at your fingertips”. Reiki goes to the core level of imbalance, and applied regularly can effectively shift life-long patterns and deepen self-love.

After my first marriage, I dug into the solace of Reiki to begin to clear the patterns within me that had attracted an angry partner who blamed me for much of the upsets. A client of mine who was a psychotherapist declared: “after any divorce you will need at least a year of weekly therapy to clear those abusive patterns and emotions.”

While I had used therapy in the past for relationship support, I now found for me, Reiki was equal to the task (and a heck of a lot more affordable). My partners since have been at a whole new level of kindness and willingness to take responsibility for doing the inner work, and even practicing self-healing with Reiki.

Situation Healing with Reiki

In Level II Reiki training, you learn to do distant healing to a person, as well as mental/emotional healings, and even send healing to any situation. As everything is energy or frequency, when difficulties arise, applying a higher frequency energy like Reiki can dissipate and release the lower vibrations of the problem.

So even if you are not able to work with someone else as they have not agreed to a Reiki session, you can send healing energy to uplift and harmonize your relationship with that person. For instance, if you are having difficulty with a colleague at work, you can ethically send Reiki to heal your situation with that person, so long as it is for the highest good of all and not using it to try to control another.

Healing Relationships Even When You’re Not in One

Scientists are finding more and more proof of the remarkable way our emotions can affect our immune system and overall health. Emotions that have not been fully resolved and released will continue to impact you on every level and can even affect your physical and mental health, not just your relationships.

I have done a lot of clearing with Reiki on my own negative patterns that have emerged after a breakup, with the awareness that if I didn’t want to keep attracting the same problems in another relationship I could do my part to release the “issues in my tissues.”

Reiki has allowed me and my clients to continue to do the personal work around relationships even when not in one, in order to clear the way for a more harmonious and supportive fit next time.

Relationships are Mirrors

Reiki treatments are a wonderful way to begin taking responsibility for our own energy and state of being. Relationships are often mirrors showing us aspects of ourselves, both positive and negative, for us to become more aware. Reiki will clear out the closets of any mental/emotional baggage that is keeping you from experiencing more fulfilling relationships.

There is a saying that “all healing is self-healing.” As you apply Reiki to all aspects of your relationships, you will find that you are surrounded more and more by people who value and appreciate you. And if you’re really lucky they also share Reiki with you too!

This blog was first published in 2012 and updated to as you read it now, in 2021.

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