I am noticing something remarkable yet subtle that is occurring with me and all of my long time clients. At first I struggled to find a way to verbalize it until one day in a session as I listened to a client describe a new sense of calm and non-reaction in the face of many challenges, I coined this phrase to describe the deep transformational process is occurring as “The Softening”.
Sometimes our most profound shifts are the subtle ones. We often look for the big fireworks of mystical light shows or grand visions in meditations, or even other incarnations (past lives) to mark the spiritual terrain we travel, and tell us we really have arrived.
Yet the more important shifts can sneak in almost unnoticed. Like the unheralded calm in the midst of the chaos. Or the lessening of our familiar triggers from people we have “history” with. It is these shifts that are often the hallmarks of true transformation. It is as if we are gifted the Pause button and have a chance to review our negative version of the story, and can finally re-choose not to react in the same knee jerk way of resistance, anger, pain, frustration and hurt.
As we become more conscious that we don’t want to add any more scenes to that old story line, we begin to see other options, perhaps for the first time. It may be silence and stillness. Yet this space is not a clamping down of our feelings, which just creates more negative charge that will pop out eventually. It is not a denial of how hurtful or out of bounds someone is being.
It is more like you become a witness of the whole play, and you realize you all were playing your well-acted roles in character. Yet you now can step out of that character (your personality and your story thus far) and re-write the script. Change the usual lines. Or just observe knowing it is not just about you and your old scenes. You can take the perception of the playwright, the audience, or another actor. Or you can walk out of the theater and choose another play entirely.
What creates this “Softening”?
For me and my clients, it has been a combination of many things: Managing and separating my energy (what is mine, what is not mine).
Regularly releasing all the denser emotions, and limiting concepts of myself I have collected along the way that tell me I am not good enough, smart enough, thin or pretty enough, spiritual enough, detached enough, successful enough. Resetting to happy, certain, present, powerful, gracious.
Re-aligning to the Truth of who I am (an unlimited multidimensional spiritual being) and to the Love that created me and all things. Seeing that Truth & Love expressing through others, even in their painful mis-creations. Loving what is, and knowing that Love (the Highest vibration) truly heals all.
Taking ultimate Soul level responsibility for my scenes, script and divine play. Consciously re-writing the parts that I no longer love to play–the ones that perpetuate separation and suffering. Reclaiming my divine play… the one where I KNOW I am a cosmic spark of the Divine Flame, a perfected light shimmering in (this moment) a human form. Not judging.
Looking for unity and connectedness. Breathing in Oneness and delighting in the multi-faceted crystalline essence we all reflect. Marveling at the splendor of life in all its myriad formations. Feeling deep gratitude and aligning with joy.
Ultimately for me I experienced the fullness of this oh so precious “Softening” through the merging with Yeshua and his anointing with Higher Love this past year. It is as if all of my sharp edges are melting in this soft love… this Self Love.
This Softening can sneak up on you. The harsher porcupine prickles of old scars suddenly are smoothed over…the hooks are gone, so they don’t snag another’s similar quills any longer.
Giving that actor a chance to also re-choose another part…another line. Or change roles entirely, and take the mask off, or at least let it down for awhile longer.
We often associate softness with weakness, and Self Love with selfishness, yet it is the exact opposite. I have never felt so centered and so strong in this soft flowing river of love…like the willow tree whose strength comes from its flexibility. I have never felt so powerfully present and overflowing for my clients and for my healing and earth keeping service work. My clients are experiencing it too…in ever increasing waves of connectedness, centeredness, and calm which show up in their relationships as more ease, in their businesses as more clients and money, in their hearts as more love.
Ease and grace sneak in a side door. Icebergs in the heart melt, overflowing the ports (portals). Fear and doubt and worry are washed away, leaving a certainty of the perfection underlying everything, a trust in the divine timing of things, a deepening sense of “okayness.”