In Part I of this series, I wrote about how extreme sensitivity (or Highly Sensitive Person) is both a blessing and a curse. On the one hand, it enables you to notice subtle sensations that allow you to more deeply understand how others may be feeling. On the other hand, you can feel bombarded by stimuli and have difficulty processing loud noises, crowds, and chaotic environments.

Would you be surprised to discover that you may be experiencing thoughts and emotions – and they are not even yours?! This is actually very often the case, and it turns out to be very good news, once you understand how to make separations and clear those energies and emotions.

Why Would Anyone Feel Other People’s Energy and Emotions?

Well, several reasons come to mind. My first response would be my favorite teaching:

1. Everything is Energy: even thoughts and emotions have a signature frequency and can be discerned by many people, and all animals. As you grow in awareness, the subtler realms of sensation and feeling energies becomes more heightened, and you become more empathic.
2. Compassion: You have chosen to help/feel/heal others.
3. Protection: You wish to have a “heads-up” of what is coming your way so you can prepare/protect yourself.

How Do We Feel Other People’s Energy and Emotions?

As explained above, it is actually quite natural to feel others’ energies. All life forms have a subtle energy field, also know as the aura or biofield, which picks up many stimuli in the environment. Our personal energy field acts as a communications device, transmitting and receiving energy and information about our surroundings.

The natural distance for our personal energy field is approximately an arm’s length out in a circle all around us. However, it is not static and can be extended much farther than that, or retracted very tightly right up to the skin. We can learn how to play with our energy field and make it more appropriate for different situations. (more on this in Part III).

How Do We Know What We are Feeling is not Ours?

This may take some practice. For me, it has taken many years of practice and learning techniques to become more aware, then to manage and clear my energy and my field, and ultimately to reset my boundaries on how I choose to be an empathic healer in a body.

Accept that everything you feel is not about you. Some people may have trouble with this but it is essential to begin to have more discernment and detachment.

Awareness: Notice the circumstances. If a feeling comes on quite suddenly and without any supporting reason, that could be a clue. Of course, our mental/emotional bodies are quite changeable and the reasons we feel things are not always rational and logical. If you are serious about your personal and spiritual growth, you do need to honor what you feel as that can be a signpost that something is amiss and you need to explore a bit deeper.

Ask for Clarity: Many years ago I was noticing I was getting depressed quite suddenly and often after visiting a supermarket or other public place. I was a dedicated spiritual warrior/healer and was constantly unearthing more layers of stuff I felt I had to “work on”.

Then I had a major “aha” – what if all this sadness wasn’t even mine? I sat and meditated on the question and got a very clear message that it in fact was not. I was feeling someone else, and as a healer felt compelled to take responsibility and begin clearing it. What a relief! I was working overtime on everyone else—and it was such a comfort to have this understanding that I was not so sad after all!

Use Energy Clearing Techniques to begin to sort out what is you, and what is not you. There are many modalities to choose from, and whatever works to help you feel more centered, balanced, stable, clear and lighter is extraordinarily useful. This makes up the bulk of my energy alchemy practice, as it is a daily practice, not a one-time deal. It is not unlike needing to change air filters regularly. We are all impacted by all energy all the time, even our animals, and it is necessary to find practices that you can do regularly to support filtering out the gunk.

Intention. A great place to start shifting your experience is always to set a clear intention. Try this for a simple yet very potent energy clearing:

ENERGY ALCHEMY INTENTION: “I release any energies that are not mine.”

NEXT: Part III: How to Manage your Energy SO You Don’t Take on Other People’s Stuff